Funny Facebook Quotes and Sayings

Kash Facebook pe"Add as girlfrnd"ka option hota
...
Sala propose krne ka panga hi khatm Acept kr liya to maan gayi nahi to
.......
Facebook pe Konsi Ladkiya kam Hai.

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 life m kuch aisa mukam hasil
Karne ki koshish kro ki
Log apka naam
FACEBOOK par nhi,
GOOGLE pe search kare

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 DRIVING TEST:
POLICE: Wat do u do in red signal?
Boy: I usually text, check mails n browse facebook..!
MODERN GENERATION

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 Twinkle twinkle little star,
Salman khan is a film star,
Sania mirza is a btmntn star,
BUT
I am a facebook star!

 Up Coming Facebook Movies
1.Jab We Chat
2.Namastey Facebook
3.Hum Aapke Hai Mutual Friend
4.7 Gaali Maaf
5.Hum Like Kar Chuke Sanam
6.Kabhi Relationship Kabhi Single
7.Meine Poke Q Kiya
8.Mere Brother Ki Profile..
Dekna Math Bhulna.

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 A Man Joind FACEBOOK
His Son Wrote On
His Wall
"W T F Dad"
Man Rplied:
Wht8 D Hell,
U’ve No Respect 4 Me ?
Kid Rplied:
Dad Chill It Means
"Welcome To Facebook"

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tere status ki wo namkeen baaten,
tere sms se wo mulaakaten,
Nahi bhulunga me,
Jab Tak Hai Facebook
Jab tak Hai Facebooke
Wo tera like karke cmnt na krna,
Wo tera sms ka rply na krna,
Nahi bhulunga me,
Jab Tak Hai Facebook
Jab Tak Hai Facebook 

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 Sagar me pani ki koi kami nahi.
Asman me taro ki koi kami nahi.
Gulsan me phulo ki koi kami nahi.
Dunia me logo ki koi kami nahi.
Ye facebook he yaro yaha dosto koi kami nahi

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 Boy sends friend request to Girl on Facebook :- Girl :- Kaunn ho tum ? Boy :- Hasrat tumhari ....... Girl :- Chahte kya ho ? ... Boy : Mohhabat tumhari ......... Girl:- Pachtaoge tum .......... Boy :- Kismat hamari ......... Girl :- Married hoon main ...... Boy: To Status single se hata Manhoos Naari

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 height of shoks!!!
Malkin- Kya hua, Tum 3 din se kaam pe Q nhi ayi??
Kamwali- memsab maine to Facebook pe status Update kor diya tha.
K mai gaaw ja rohi hu,
Or
Apke pati ne to coment B kiya tha
"jaldi aana, MISS U so much"

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 Santa ki wife mar gayi.
Banta- tuje kuch chahiye?
Santa-jaldi Laptop le aa
Bnta- Kyo?
Santa- facebook pe status change krke single krna hai.

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 Facebook, if you want to know Everyone;
Twitter, if you want to know Everything.

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 Facebook ek Mandir hai
Page ek Murti hai Status prasad hai
status Update karne wala Pujari hai
status padhne wala bhagthai
status padhke"LIKE" na kare....
Wo mandir k baharbaitha BIKHARI Hai

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 FACEBOOK ki sabse GHATIYA
cheez.
1Yar maine status update
kiya hai, Like kar de or Mast sa
comment bhi.
(2)Yar teri Id ka passwrd kya hai, ek din
ke liye use karne de.
(3)Logo ke status chura kar
apni id par share karna.
(4)Maine apni Profile pic change ki hai,
Meri Pic Like kar de, Mai teri kar dunga.
(5)Oye Tag pic par jaldi se Comment or
Like kar.
6*Yar wo ladki kon hai jo bade comment
mar rahi hai, or Agle hi din use Frnd
request send
Nd the best
7*Add me add me add me....

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 ye facebook ki duniya bhi ajib hain....
jisko jante nhi the aaj wo dil k karib hain....
Chahe kuch bhi ye jaman
Par ab ye faceboook hi humara Nashib hain....

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 Somebody Just Threw A
Chappal At Me.
I Was Going To Call The Press
And The Police,
But

-It Was My Mom Asking Me
To Get Off Facebook. . . »

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 Unblock Ur Facebook Friend Request 100% working:
1. Go to facebook account & check that how many days ur friend request still blocked.
2. Then go to Date & time on ur computer & increase the date.
Example: If ur friend request block for 30 days, then increase the date to 1 month.

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 Top 12 peoples who
changed internet forever::
1•Sir Tim Berners Lee – World
Wide Web
2•Vint Cerf And Bob Kahn –
TCP/IP
3•Larry Page and Sergey Brin –
Google Inc
4•David Filo and Jerry Yang –
Yahoo! Inc.
5•Bill Gates – Microsoft
6•Steven Paul Jobs – Apple Inc.
7•Mark Zuckerberg – Facebook
8•Chad Hurley and Steve Chen –
YouTube
9• Linus Torvalds – Linux
10• Jack Dorsey – Twitter
11• Kevin Rose – Digg
12• Bram Cohen – Bit Torrent

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 Facebook In Singham Style:
.
Ayyee.
Apne Profile Ka Solid Akad
Hai Na Tere Ko!!
Tere Is Wallpost Ka
Postmartam Kar Sakta Hu
Abhi Ke Abhi
Tere Is Profile Ko Deactivate
Kar Sakta Hu Main Abhi Ke AbhiTere Is Profile Ka Aisa
Interior Decoration Karunga
Ki Profile Kam Blank Page
Jyada Lagega Abhi Ke Abhi
Ye Page Mera Hai Aur Main
Is Page Ka Jaykant Shikde!
.Maajhi Satakli Re!! ;)

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 agar facebook users films banate
to unke name kaise hote
Jab We Chat
Namaste facebook
Hum aapke hai mutual friend
Hum like kar chuke sanam
Maine comment q kiya
Mughse chating karogi

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 Coming Soon Movies:
‘Likes’ na milenge dubara.
Kabhi facebook Kabhi twitter…
Hum Block ho Chuke Sanam…
Facebook ne bana di jodi…
Jab Poke kiya to darna kya…
Mere brother ki Id….
Inbox aaj kal…
3 wallposts
Ajab photos ki gajab tagging
No One blockd Jessica… = P = D

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 There are 2 types of
human beings found on
Facebook.
One who gets enormous
amount of likes and
comments on their posts…
&
&
&
&
The others are Boys __

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 Facebook is now like home,
if you don’t come back in 24 hours
it means you are either lost, dead, sick or hadan accident

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 Best breakup :
Girl:I hate u get lost, I Don't wanna talk to you,This relationship is over-
Boy:what happnd??
I didn't look up with any girl, I love only you..!
Girl:Shut up, i don't wanna be with you, you didn't 'Like' my status on facebook ..!

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 मत बहाना सस्ते आंसू, FACEBOOK
की दीवालों पर..
फिर भड़केगी ज्वाला शायद,
मुर्दों की मशालों पर..!!!
वतन की वेदी पे जिसने, बेटाअपना खोया है..
तुमको क्या फरक पड़ेगा, फिरआज
तिरंगा रोया है..!!!
Macdonlds में तुम बर्गर खाते, तुमने कब कुछ
खोया है..
शहीद हुआ वो लाल था मेरा, फिर आज
तिरंगा रोया है..!!!
XXX पे तुम कसक मिटाते..तुमने कब
क्या खोया है..
नंगे-जिस्मो में क्या पता पड़ेगा, क्यूँ आज
तिरंगा रोया है
PA1

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 Beggar : mam 1rs pls
Mam : i have seen u somewhere
Beggar : ya mam we are friends on FACEBOOK

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 Arz Kiya Hai....
.Bigdi Hui #Zindagi Ki Bas Itni Si Kahaani Hai....
Wah... Wah...
Bigdi Hui #Zindagi Ki Bas Itni Si Kahaani Hai....
.Wah... Wah...
20% To Hum Bachpan Se #Kamine The....
80% #Facebook / #BBM / #WhatsApp Ki Meharbani hai :P :D

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 You know the meaning of facebook?
F=fact
A=A
C=Canteen which is
E=Exclamation and
B=bad
O=of
O=one
K=kind
Book mean (one kind of bad work)
Face mean (fact a canteen which is exclamation)

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 facebook बंद हो जायेगा... पेज delete
हो जायेगा,
मेरा नाम ही मेरी पहचान है... गर याद
रहे...

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 Whatsapp + wechat + facebook + BBM + line + hike + viber + twitteR + . . . Now we need a car's battery to run our mobile :D

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 Daily need of 2011 children :
Food-.......... ?. ??? 5%
Water-......... ? 2%
Sleep-.......... ??? 3%
Facebook-..... ???????? 90%

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 Orkut pe ladki patayi
Facebook pe baat chalayi
Twiter pe mom dad se milayi
Yahoo pe divorce ho gaya
Chalo isi bahane computer course to ho gya.

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 Girl: Why my name is always on your Facebook status in every 2 minutes?
Boy: Facebook keeps asking me what's on my mind ?
And honestly, it's always you...

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 LADY 2 BHIKHARI- MAiNE TUMHE KAHI DEKHA H?
BHIKHARI- KYA MADAM! KAL HI TO facebook PE CHATTING KI THI OR AAPNE MERI PHOTO PE COMMENT b DIA THA... :p :p :p

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 Modern definition of "BEST FRIEND" ...A person who has most number of 'likes' and 'comments'on your posts on 'Facebook'. :) :)

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 Aaj Kal Ke High
Tech Students Ki
Zindagi Television: 2
Ghanta
Facebook Pe
Chatting: 3 Ghanta
Mobile Par: 12
Ganta Doston Ke Sath: 2
Ghanta
Sona: 4 Ganta Aur Padhai Baba Ji Ka
Ghanta…

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 Height Of Social Networking:
A girl's facebook status: I'm online
from Toilet ..!!
Her Sis commented on status:''come
out fast, I'm getting emergency!!

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 1) Pehli Baat:
Har insaan itna bura nahin
hota, jitna “PAN
Card” Aur “Aadhar Card”
mein dikhta hai,
Aur itna achcha bhi nahin hota, jitna
“facebook” aur
“whatsapp” pe dikhta hai.
2) Dusri Baat:
Har insaan itna bura nahin
hota, jitna uski “Biwi” usko samajhti hai,
Aur itna achcha bhi nahin
hota, Jitna uski
“Maa” usko samjhti hai.

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 An ordinary person will be with the book
but an xtra ordinary person will in that book
Be an xtra ordinary person like me
Yeah Me ON FACEBOOK

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 Girl: Why my name is always onyour
Facebook status in every 2minutes?
Boy: Facebook keep asking me what's
On my mind ?And honestly, it's always you...

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 Boy To Moon :
Why My Girlfriend Loves A Rose
Which Dies In A Day & Doesn't Luv Me
When I Die For Her Everyday?
Moon 2 Boy:
Nice One Dude,
Post It On FACEBOOK.

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 Boy:
Will You Marry Me?
Girl:
Yes!
(Boy Starts Running)
Girl:
Hey Where Are You Going?
Boy:
I'm Going To Update
My Relationship Status On Facebook =P.

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 What is *FACEBOOK*?
F=FAKE ID
A=AWARENESS
C=CHEAT
E=EARNESTY
B=(BEST
O=ONE KIND
O=OF
K=KICK)

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 Ye Baat Sun kar Mere Hatho
Se Golgappa Hi Gir Gaya..
Jab Golgappe Waale Ne Kaha,
"Pls Give Ur Feedback
On Our Facebook Page.

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 Ek Aurat Ek Bhikhari se
Maine Tumhe Pehle Kahi To Dekha Hai?
Bhikhari-Kya Memsaab,
Kal Hi To
FACEBOOK
Pe CHAT Kiya Tha Mere Saath.

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 kitne log Aise hote hey
Ghar me 2-3 bache hote hey or
Facebook pe likh dalte hey...

I m single ready to single...:)